Helping people communicate effectively

FOUR TABOO PHRASES

As a Mystery Patient in oh,so many offices, these are 4 phrases that are particularly off--putting:

"Just relax"

This is tantamount to saying, "I have no idea how to help you ... you're on your own". This is especially disturbing when it's said by a clinical person who is in a position to aid the patient.  Instead of dropping that statement in the patient's lap, provide some specific means to help the patient feel more at ease. Whatever means you use/offer, a caring attitude and open discussion can go a long way to developing patient trust and loyalty.  Also reference this paper on patient anxiety.

"We can't (don't) do that"

This sentence usually follows a patient or customer request. In fact, sometimes it is possible for the request to be done, but it's not practical or doesn't make good business sense. Regardless, the approach to the request can be made in a positive or negative way.  Whenever possible it's far better to phrase a "turn-down" in a positive way ... :"Here's what we CAN do for you ..." This re-wording exercise is worthy of practice in team meetings!

"You don't understand"

This is somewhat similar to the sentence above, but it goes one step further.  It takes a negative stance AND it berates the speaker in a very subtle way.  It's like saying, "you're at fault for not understanding or not grasping the big picture."  Instead, it's best to take some responsibility for the misunderstanding, "Let me rephrase that so I'm a bit more clear ..."

"It's crazy around here today"

This is one of my personal favorites!  It amazes me how often I hear this, both on the phone and in person.  This is inappropriate for any patient or customer to hear from a staff person.  I believe this statement is used with patients and customers when it is a catch phrase used among the team in casual chats.  These words then leak out to patients - you'd be surprised how easily and often this happens!

This topic is addressed in the following program ...

SEMINAR:
The Mystery Patient:

How to Gain and Retain Patients in Challenging Times

OH NO ... THERE'S CONFLICT!

On a scale of 1-10 how does your team handle conflict?

     1=There is NO conflict on our team

     5/6=We have a good bit of conflict, sometimes it works out, sometimes it doesn't

     10=Hurtful, mean conflict is the norm on our team

Ideally, on this scale the "healthy" team would rate themselves 4.  Whoa, you may say, that doesn't sound so good!  It IS good.  It means that the team feels secure enough to discuss different viewpoints and they're okay about disagreement with a goal of making the best decisions for the group.  The conflict is not personal or mean-spirited.  They trust each other and seek to make decisions for the greater good.

I become concerned for a group when they say they never disagree ... when there's never any conflict. They're often in a state of denial and they're probably not making the best decisions for the business. If people are afraid to say what they think, if they hesitate to disagree, differing viewpoints are not allowed and there is little creative growth.

The ability to effectively embrace and manage conflict is key for a team. However, this is not an independent skill. First a team must develop deep trust in each other. They must place their personal or department goals aside for the greater good.  Each team member must be willing to call on each other to be responsible to the team, and they must be able to equitably manage their own disagreements without having "the boss" called in to each issue.

These issues and much more are addressed in this seminar and powerfuil team retreat: 

RETREAT & SEMINAR:

MANAGING THE
5 DYSFUNCTIONS OF A TEAM

This powerful program is based on the Wall Street Journal best-selling book of the same name by author, Patrick Lencioni.

Bring this program to your group - send an inquiry through the form in the column on the right.

MANAGING  EMPTY PROMISES

     "I sent it to you last week." 

CELL PHONES AND MEETINGS

The following happened years ago, when cell phones were novelties. At that time it was quite rare to see anyone use such a phone in public, never mind at a meeting. 

I'd just been introduced as speaker to a group of about 125 people.  I had started my opening story when I heard a phone ring ... in the front row!  A woman proceeded to carry on a discussion right in front of me!  She cupped her hand over the phone, but it made no difference.  The novelty of the phone, the oddity of the timing and the rudeness of this woman meant that every eye was the phone chatter.  Fortunately I had a wireless microphone and I continued to talk while moving toward the far side of the room.  This was a first, and one I'll never forget.

Cell phones: 

What has become a significant irritation for all involved, the issue of the cell phone must be managed at the start of the meeting or  before the speaker is introduced. "Before we start, let's all take out our cell phones and either turn then off or to vibrate.  I'll give you a few moments right now to do that."  Now look at the audience and wait to see that some action is being taken.  If you don't do the "look ahd wait" step, it's likely that many people won't even hear your request!

If it's a very small meeting and you know everyone, ask them to "leave your cell phones on the table by the door and you can use them during the break.  This will help us focus on our group issues."  Circumstances must be right to do this, and when they are, this is highly effective!

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